Thursday, July 31, 2014
Sometimes life gets pretty hectic and I feel like I'm a passenger on an amusement park ride for the first time. You see in front of you, but you don't really know what's going to happen, until it's about to happen. And it goes very fast!
I am a working mom of three children. I work a 40 hour week and then go home to take care of my family and my home. Although I must admit the home gets a bit neglected. Just like your battles, you have to pick and choose your chores.
I question myself a lot. I'm a doing a good job? Should I be doing more? Is this enough? I tend to wonder, are my parenting methods right? Should I yell less? Should I discipline more. It sucks cause with all the how to books and Dr Spock books on parenting, they can never truly prepare you.
But then you find cool stuff like this in your bag, when you're on your way to work.
And somehow the ride comes to a stop! You feel a burst of emotions!
This is the best poem I have ever read and have been given! It was written by my daughter Devynn. She was diagnosed with Dyslexia. She isn't writter and writing is something she doesn't like to do. So it makes this that much more special!
I may not know exactly what I'm doing and my methods may not be what the how to books say to do. But you go by what your heart says!
Sunday, July 27, 2014
So my daughter is spending time at her aunts house, and the boys are here with us. She just called to check in with us.
Her and Donovan have always had a very strong bond. She is very protective of him and he always looks for her.
After speaking to me and her dad, she asked to talk to Dono... We couldn't hear devynn but hearing Dono brought tears to my eyes. It was one of the most spontaneous and appropriate conversations we've ever heard.
Dono: Hi Devynn
Dono: Are you okay?
Dono: Now Devynn, talk fast... (He speeds up) Everything is okay and talk to you later! Okay now Bye!!!!
I laughed a happy laugh. That laugh that makes you all warm and brings happy tears to your eyes!
Monday, July 14, 2014
I remember when the doctor told me what I had already suspected. Donovan has Autism. I felt the world coming down on me and right away began to think of all the things in life he wouldn't be able to do! I was very protective of him and hovered over him all the time.
When he started Early Intervention, the therapist told me that I had to be stern and that I had to make Donovan work for what he wanted. If I continued to just give in, he would never progress. And so I took their advice and we made him request for things. I was amazed at the first time he pointed at his sippy cup, after asking him what did he want. I started placing it in random places and repeating "what do you want?", just so he would point. It excited me. It gave me hope, but I was still very protective, and kept thinking that I had to be particular about activities, because my Dono, wouldn't be able to do it.
My hubby would constantly tell me, "leave him, you can't keep babying him!" I just thought he was in denial, and couldn't accept that our son was Autistic.
Dono constantly surprised me! When he began center based EI, he learned sign, and then slowly began to say words! I started realizing that my autistic child was capable of so much! But my biggest eye opener was watching my Donomite learn how to swim with Typical children.
Here he is at his last lesson at Roberto Clemente State Pool, they jumped into 11ft of water. And held my breath and was ready to jump in and save him!
But he jumped in like a champ!
And then he came back up and the smile on his face said it all! "I can do this!" He waved at me and swan his heart out!
He was so at ease and was so proud of himself! And I knew at that moment that I was limiting my Donomite! And I would never do that again! He is limitless!
Here he is again, starting the summer off with a dip in the deep end! Fearless!
And here he is riding his bike, with no training wheels! He insisted we take them off.
He wanted to play baseball, and so he does!
He refuses to use a Tee! He wants the ball to be pitched to him! So he can "hit the ball".
I know how scary it can be, and how much you want to protect your child. But, as scary and hard as it can be, you have to allow them to try! How else will you know what they are capable of? Will it be easy? No! Will they have meltdowns? More than likely yes! But just like any typical child you teach them, and guide them. You even reprimand them if it's required. I promise you won't be disappointed!
Wednesday, July 9, 2014
I remember wanting to have a child. I was willing to do whatever it took to become a mother. It was a process and a roller coaster of emotions. I miscarried, and I had a blighted Ovum. It took a lot of prayer, injections, pills, and doctor visits!
And just when I thought I would have to try another method, BAM! I got pregnant! I was blessed with a beautiful little girl! My Devynn.
Imagine my surprise when she was 4 months old and I learned I was pregnant AGAIN! I said to myself I prayed so hard God felt I needed another blessing! He gave me my Donomite!
Devynn and Dono, immediately connected. She was nurturing and very protective of him. He looked up to her. In fact, she was a huge part of his progress. He would imitate her, and responded to her! She didn't fully understand, but she would and still to this day tries to help others understand him.
Every so often, she will ask me "mommy when you die, do I have to take care of Donovan?" And my reply is "you don't have to, but I would hope that you will always look out for each other" Dev and Dono have a younger brother. My littlest one Dustin. I am doing all I can to raise them, to love one another and to support each other.
See, my Devynn has Dyslexia. She struggles in school, and doesn't like to read or write. So I worry about her too! I push her to try her best and to have confidence in herself.
This is one of Devynn's creations! It says, this is my other brother. He is Autistic, and I really do love in my heart! I saw this on her bedroom door. I was filled with so much emotion. Even with all the errors, I still feel the love that she has for him.
It shows me that I'm doing something right, and it gives me hope! It eases my fear of the future. I can see that she is her brothers keeper! And her brothers will be their sisters keeper!